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An Ugly Scene

We’ve been talking about going to visit the family in Texas this summer. Last night Mallory said to me, “When you go visit Grandmom in Texas, is it okay if I stay home?”

I said, “No, it’s not,” and she fell on the floor and started weeping hysterically. And loudly. (Phoebe helpfully pointed out, “My ky-ing!”)

I finally got her to explain that she didn’t want to go to Texas because she’s afraid that her ears will hurt on the airplane. Even though she’s flown, I don’t know, at least ten times in her life already and her ears have never hurt on the airplane before.

I told her that everyone would miss her if she didn’t come along. I told her that she would miss me if she didn’t come along. I told her that she wouldn’t have any fun if she stayed at home. I told her that her other grandparents (where she suggested she would stay) had not invited her to stay at their house for a week. I told her that we could give her chewing gum to help with the ear thing. I told her that we could talk to her doctor about ways to keep her ears from hurting. I told her everything except what she wanted to hear, which was that she had my permission to stay behind.

The crying continued. (“My aw-right?” Phoebe asked.) The phone rang. As I went to answer, Chris told her, “Fine! You can stay home! Now stop crying already.”

Unfortunately, that didn’t help either. Mallory has always needed affirmation from both of us. (Mommy, can I have a drink of water? Yes. Daddy, Mommy says I can have a drink of water. Is that okay? Yes!) “Mommy, Daddy says I can stay home. Is it okay with you?” she asked me tearfully.

I just couldn’t say yes. If she’d been a little bit younger, I might have been able to tell the lie just to shut her up, but I couldn’t bring myself to do it last night. I said no. More crying. Unbelievable amounts of crying. Finally she said, “Are we going to go the very first day of summer?”

“No, it’ll be probably in the middle of the summer,” I said.

And with that, she stopped crying and dropped the subject.

Kids are so weird.

PS Holly, thanks for your comment. You’re right that I need to focus on the long-term rather than the short-term. Congrats on your five pounds!

Comments

Anonymous said…
Poor Mallory! She reminds me of my mother. By this I mean that my mother almost always thinks of the worst case scenario whether that has ever happened to her or not. Just because is happened to someone else, it might happen to her the next time she flies. I don't know what to do with people like that!

Mom
aimee said…
Rhett is like that too. In fact, I know a lot of people like that. You did the right thing. It is good that you didn't give in. Because she will remember if you had said okay, she can stay home.
H Noble said…
I witnessed a lot of 'weirdness' this weekend too- spending the time with my nephews. Kids are great though and really see things as they are sometimes.
We were at the DQ on Sunday and Claudia Hanes asked my 4 year old nephew if she could have a bite of his ice cream. His response: "Why did you not get your own?" (And she did not get a bite!)

You're welcome, and I know the power of encouragement, especially on weight loss. Hang in there!
H

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