Skip to main content

K-I-S-S-I-N-G. (N-O-T.)

Mallory announced before bedtime that, before school today when no one was looking, she kissed her boyfriend on the lips. She had the gleam in her eye that usually signals Giant Fib, but I took the hard line nonetheless. "That's not appropriate," I said. "You could get in big trouble if you get caught. No kissing at school."

"No kissing, period," Chris added.

"What does 'period' mean?" Mallory asked.

"It means, no kissing at all. You're too young for that," Chris said.

"When will I be old enough?" our daughter asked. "When I'm sixteen?"

"No...when you're thirty," Chris said.

"Thirty? Are you kidding me?"

"Thirty. And even then, you have to ask our permission first. If we don't like the guy, you won't be allowed."

Mallory thought about that for a minute. Then she said, "How old do I have to be before I can kiss someone without asking you first?"

"Sixty," Chris said.

"Sixty?"

"Okay, okay. Not sixty. How about...fifty-nine."

"Humph," Mallory said. She climbed into bed and we turned off the light. A few minutes later I heard her say, "I just can't wait til I'm fifty-nine!"

Comments

aimee said…
That is so funny!

That is about the same age when Rhett will be able to drive a motorcyle. (60, not 30).
11:06 AM
Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

I ask you

This is my garden: Or rather, this is the patch of soil that was my garden last summer. It produced millions of tomatoes, dozens of green peppers, a handful of cucumbers, and two puny watermelons. I do not wish to repeat last summer's vegetable bounty, because most of said bounty went to waste. Nor, however, do I want this patch of soil to remain brown and bare throughout the summer, because it's unattractive. So, what do I plant here, in the shrubbery/flowery vein? Keep in mind that I do not have a green thumb. Also, I don't want to spend a lot of money. Also, this area is in full sun most of the day. And it's really hot. And sometimes we get rabbits. Any advice? To thank you in advance, I give you these goofy photos of my children and their homemade parfaits (which Mallory persisted in calling "specialinis").
5 comments
Read more

the closet

Amy has challenged me to list 8 things that are hidden in the back of my closet. I try not to actually look to closely at the back of my closet, so these are my closest guesses: 1. At least three no-longer-needed diaper bags. 2. An outfit that I've been meaning to return to Land's End for at least six months now. 3. One of our wedding pictures, which has a broken frame which I keep meaning to replace. 4. Shoes, shoes, shoes, shoes. 5. Possibly a pair of fuzzy slippers. I miss those fuzzy slippers. Maybe I should brave the mess and go try to find them. 6. Baby blankets. 7. A few small toys that I meant to stick in the girls' Christmas stockings. Maybe next year. 8. And I'm guessing, a bunch of mismatched socks. My closet isn't very interesting, I'm afraid.
1 comment
Read more

The Golf Course

There was a miniature golf course in my grandparent’s house. There were, in fact, lots of cool-if-kitschy things in my grandparents’ house. There were swinging saloon doors between the kitchen and the master suite. There was a toilet seat made of transparent plastic, with ticket stubs from horse races embedded therein. There was a globe wine bar (pictured!). There was a mounted goat head (the goat was named Bucky) on whose antlers my granddad hung his golf caps. There was a stuffed pheasant whose chest feathers were smooth as silk. There was a kitchen bar of green marbled formica and swively kitchen chairs of red pleather. There was an automatic ice dispenser on the refrigerator, which was a rare and awe-inspiring thing in the 1970’s. There was a mirrored tray holding bejeweled perfume bottles with atomizers in the guest bathroom. There were two huge oil paintings – one of my aunt, with beautifully frosted hair, holding a Pug, one of my older sister as a toddler sitting on a John De...
7 comments
Read more